the end and the beginning

how long have i actually not blogged?...i think i was at the edge of forgetting about my blog
anyway....exams are OVER for now..hahas...i am probably the last to exclaim that...but for the first time that i took only 3 papers...i feel much more relieved..thank God for showing urself faithful=)
hahas...straight after the last math paper which i found better than promos...i went straight for my bag hunt
think i used it to motivate to study too much..that i felt a little despair after searching and ramaging most part of orchard and bugis..
karmen...i really wasnt that upset..guess i m just impulsive...
friday i was at it again..went to queensway again...but ended up with the gals benefitting from the whole trip..u all are the best man..haha
saturday was a really unusual yet special day...went out with the cg and huiling...
wanted to go canoe with the rest but hl was rather terrified..oops...ya...so got no choice but to go cycling with her
after stealing her bike and nearly running over some dogs and all.....we left east coast to head for church in a rush
that was the climax i guess...
although my stomach was making noises and felt so exhausted....God's presence overcame all of that...worship that day was just so anointed..and filled with so much of God's grace and power...God reminded me that no matter wat...in my goodie and baddie days...watever circumstances..i still need him badly
many times...most people dun understand..this especially hurts if ur close friend does it...
like they question u...they make comments about u...that u thought they truly understood...in case u're wondering..i arent speaking for myself..
thats the difference in the level of our love for God..i guess....that can be such a big bother at times
we all need to learn that we're living for this cause and that God called us to "lay down our lives" for him...this isnt just about the talk..its isnt just about showing up at services...its about telling urself..no matter if it rains or shine..i'll pick myself up to go to church to worship...thats commitment
i know i m not perfect...but i just felt God saying this clearly

as for life and whatever it brings...i get distracted rather easily...i tend to stray into the wrong paths....fall for the wrong things...but i pray that i would not stay in this situation permanently...i'll CROSS that line...

hoildays has started...without much allowance to slack and rest...
just thinking of how much i had revised....really bothers me
yesterday made me realized how important it is to treasure life and not be trashy
many times...we are the one that make the decision...and when the consequence...we found it hard to believe...come on...u made the first step..u should have thgt of the next
went out to KAP to study with karmen, claire and brandon...hahas
most of the time our minds were drifting away....to food..to random stuff...
but it was great time..met joseph and kailin...and his friend..

need to tell myself its holidays...and i can have even more time for God...and his Word....must put in the effort to stay close to Him and to hear Him speak...and not miss the time now
sometimes...u might not get to see someone's true colour...till the most extreme situation confronts..disappointment

but really leds me to understand who are the true friends that i have in my life...
thank you God...that no matter how messed up..things around me might have gone...you are my tower of refuge and strength...you will never leave or forsake me..=)

one more day to start working...jiayou guys!

from the last time i updated up to now...the things around me have evolved so much..and glad to say all of them are positive
"friendship is not just strong because the friends have similar interests and characteristics, it is not about how long the phone call is...or how frequent we actually msg each other....
it is the sharing of the happy, sad, sour...bitter events of life together.."
"through the trials and moment of uncertainty...there lies ahead a opening out of the darkness to something even greater...a friendship that is made to last a lifetime"
thank you God turning wat is meant for evil for the good of ur children

oh ya..before i forget...here's a short bible verse from the previous prayer meeting that the pastor mentioned that turn my view 180 degrees
hebrews 12:1-2
"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares u, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking onto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God"

if u are just wondering wat these two verses were talking about, we are running the race for Christ and many times we get so tired and weighed down by the things that goes on in our lives and the sins which we commit and threaten to overthrow all controls in our lives...that is the time we got to hang on!
the cloud of witnesses are the people of faith from the Bible like Abraham, Isaac, Joseph which had already completed their race..this race is not a marathon..but one of a relay like the 4x100m which we all do during sports meet...
means the baton is being passed from the people to us...
if we were to give up during the race, which actually means dropping the baton..
all the other 4 runners would be disqualified
i am sure this is something enough to think about and keep me going
=)