internal turmoil

so long haven been able to just freely blog..and just not rush to do everything in the weekend
that was how i thought things would be..for this one week off
but perhaps..not all events would be so heart warming and delightful..
always felt that my parents have changed ever since i have gone into army
they now pick on the slightest thing i do
they rather i stay at home and do nothing..than to go out to catch up with friends
i m scolded for wasting my allowances away..when in actual fact..i m paying it from own "hard earned" peanuts allowance..
they wanna be the director of my life..
yet they cant keep promises
though they're adults...they get so uptight and angry so easily..
almost with little or no provoke
they cant admit their own wrong..and kids are suppose to take the blame.
the week off caused so much tension and turmoil...i seriously wanna go back to camp..
even doing push ups and running till i feel like dying dun feel so stressful
i guess at times certain things i said ain't too edifying..i m sorry bout it..
but it seem so challenging just to enjoy a full day of quality time with parents..
everyone is just bickering here there n everywhere
i wanna break free from this...sometimes i dream of just moving away to a faraway place and live my own life..eat what i like..work hard for my own living..haha
or maybe its just the inner rebel showing?..
my mind swirls whenever i think of it..
i m glad God always reminds me to "honor your parents that you may live a long life"
i need to stick to that
please give me the strength n love from above..i m seriously beaten n cant do it on my own
well time for something happier..
emerge is coming!church's annual youth conference..
know that it would be exciting and is definite to build up my spiritual life..
slept pretty late while waiting for my dad to finish using the com..
by then i was too exhausted to even upload any song into my repaired ZEN..
oh ya..went to help out at pos jc..they're doing a wow job..with a strong dance..cool cheer..they really look outstanding..all the jc cluster fight on!

some last words...=)

went for nus architecture apitude test...was a pretty much nerve wrecking experience..didnt know what to expect..and who to meet!..was just plainly stranded in a sea of happily chatting away people...met rong and xx though..
surprised that xx said hi..
anyway..the two hours in the hall..just reminded me of As..with the numerous rows and the routine of placing your ic on the top right..
making the model was fun..though i had no idea if the 'rocket' thingy i made out of paper fit into the theme..but the theme was odd enough..
then came a picture of kettle..that look like it came right of ikea's catalogue...
describing its qualities in 5 key words left me scratching my head
yeah at least its over..and i didnt had to memorise anything beforehand
had a guys' night out again..with my usual buddies
fish n co..
guess i will definitely miss their company and our crappy conversations bout our school days when i am off
woo hoo..there's no second round of interview for archi..
phew..
looking forward to the flight tonite..but not exactly the outfield..but guess it would be a good experience..
i have been thinking alot now adays..and getting a little paranoid
ahhh.
this past week of sermon..reminded me of something so important..
being on hot pursuit of my dream..
daring to confess and knowing it will come to pass if its within God's will for me
that sure encouraged me tonnes..
ok got to go..and finish packing
meanwhile u guys and girls take care...:)
keep smiling..

emo period

sometimes all the things...people..and the way they behave..
keeps me wondering..are we all leaving under that veil..or cover
that we're so well trained to be flexible enough to take on different roles at different places...times..environment or people?
that sucks...why put up that pretense?
u may fool the whole world but u cant fool yourself..and God for sure..if u believe in Him
perhaps it takes one to be in a situation of restrictions and lack to appreciate the once considered 'little' that he or she has in his or her life...
hai
does it meant to say..all that i know of u was just pure acting?..or i was too oblivious to that..
friday was really good..
never ever felt so ministered in past years' event as compared to this year
think the party will never end....dance awhile longer and u'll know..

fresh into the next phrase of NS

well..things that i dread or love..comes and goes..so is my ns life..
in a flash...hot and rainy tekong days and i am heading straight to a whole new unknown
guess alot of my previous anxiety and worries aren't really needed..
mandai camp is sure interesting..and nice looking
better than the offshore island
ok my first week of recce just passed and i would really say that the commanders made all the difference..
no matter how tough training may be...if the upper level are supportive..u'll have the motivation to fight on..hwaiting!
know rest of my buddies have their share of exp
going taiwan soon...kinda looking forward to it..especially the last two days off!
woo hoo..
sad thing is that i wouldnt be enjoying much of camp facilities and food..
gosh..the food is good..
moving off to another camp for course..
haven seen my jc friends for another week..some others for a month
gotta go for pm now..know it'll be good!
and dinner out with the guys..
ok shall post one pic...
of me without hair..and with cap?..














night out..with jc pals

cheers!

when its time to let go..its never too late
cheers karmen!
there's always someone better..
3 cheers for karmen!hip hip hooray x3
teaching sounds pretty interesting for her..haha

tekong fever

chinese new year just came and go..and before i knew it..
i was already heading back to my tekong chalet..
haha
though this year's cny isnt as exciting compared to previous years..
without my mom's side relatives all gathering at my grandma hse
since it was sold ever since my grandpa passed away
kinda miss that warm and noisy cny day one
nevertheless
still busy indulge myself with lots of food!
cant really eat much..after getting a big swollen left finger
gross.first time i understood the pain of infection..
over the last two nites at camp
as usual..when lights out..my mp3 will light up
listened to all the joyce meyer's podcasts
learnt something so real
jesus died not for us to just survive day by day
as most people do
he died so we can ENJOY..yes enjoy..
our daily lives...constantly believing and having joy in whatever we do or face
i gotta pick that up..
miss the class pple..haven seen most of them for a month or so..
so if anyone who read this and u all are meeting up..please tell me..
ok maybe we'll just meet when As are out..
haha
yeah..service tml =)
pray that this horrible cough and slight fever be gone

happy lunar new year

dear blog i m back after like almost one month plus?
so i guess to wipe the dust away and get things in order...
haha
anyway....time seriously flew by even though i wasnt exactly having fun
life on tekong can just be a tad too mundane and make u feel so screwed up
but nevertheless, i can say that i m getting used to it and slowly enjoying it?..
hmm...boy gotta become man someday
anyway just used up some of my pay to get a zen v plus
woah..its seriously small..














pretty good for the price that i paid
the videos are sharp for such a puny screen
haha..i will remain a creative fan i guess
yup..
gotta go zzz
enjoy the holis people..
hopefully i get to take some pics of my bald head tml..

UOB Plaza

its the third drawing
haha..
ok its bad coz i m sleepy and the uob building seems to be leaning sideways..
anyway..its oub plaza in the background

the first day of 2007

in a flash..i made it through 2006...
and i step straight into the first day of 2007
with rather mixed feelings..both glad his grace and strength supported me through
yet bigger challenges await..
most important thing is i m looking forward..and dashing all the way till the end..
breakaway from all the past..














pretty fireworks at marina bay..we could only see those that flew up to greater heights..
haha..we all went slightly mad..
and totally sticked shoulders to shoulders in citilink mall...never knew it could be this packed


































me, becca and huiling =)


























my countdown buddies






















































becca's photo perfect shoot















a slight flashback for christmas














we crazy people..walking while it drizzled quite heavily, hid under a pullover..tried snapping pictures..oh well.we're mad haha














my dear cousin..at service..
okie...happy new year pple!

reflecting about the future

hmm..its pretty late and i have no idea why arent i going to sleep
perhaps there's just too much going through my mind
read claire's blog and that also set me thinking bout the uni education
haha
though i keep getting attracted to the idea of studying overseas at countries like Korea..
and for once experience the culture and life there
i also know its all but just a dream thats out of proportion
besides the universities in korea offer nothing related to architecture..or maybe even designing
getting into local uni arent gonna be that easy...since there's only one course in nus
and they only take like 100 people?..
guess this is what it meant to be faced with the fear that seem to veil that goal or dream
since there's ns..and results arent out..
there's no point thinking too much..
trust that everything will work out..
ok i m sleepy now
haha

commerzbank frankfurt, germany

random..like what i always say

christmas is over...and all i can say..it is really the best time of the whole year..
though i know all this freedom gonna come to a halt in no time...that doesnt stop me from enjoying the company of friends...cell group..haha..
family..
sometimes when i come to hear of stories of people who are already serving...cant help but feel a alittle flustered..and perhaps worried..
ice cold shower water...huge portions of food..ok this dun sound terrible to most pple i guess..bug filled bunks?!
haha..
ok maybe just a little exaggerated..
oh mandy asked to post drawing..only did another..so here's it
commerzbank in frankfurt, germany
ok blogger beta seems a little cranky..i'll upload it later
met up with debbie when she came back from taiwan..
and as usual....i always seem to make her laugh..sometimes unknowingly..
haha..hey..its been great to catch up..and yeah..
friends forever..thanks lots of the xmas card =P

well...thanksgiving cg really made me thought through alot..like somehow..
my mind and thinking is pretty freed up now..no longer do situations seem so daunting...
yeah..i am under cover...
todae is the brothers day..going out with my younger bro..
hopefully he will find a bag for school..and pass his npcc test..he better!
haha

another trial..

was just thinking back after these past two years..
there's just so much that happen..
how i got cope with all the never ending work and project plus assignments
while not losing my focus on God
but even as the year draws to an end
i come to understand
many times i might have just serve so hard all in vain
i am after God himself..
i cant depend on myself..for my own strength would definitely fail
so many things i cant understand or accept
try and try again
but yet i fall no matter what
sink to some deep pit and question everything
yet reminded that as long as i m following God's will..
stand firm and always choose to do the right thing in God's eyes
not that of others

dun ever leave the presence of God even if it meant to let go of some duties

to find back that first love
doodled on some plain paper..know its a few thousand miles apart from the real thing

its abstract ok
but drawing all these structures..really free up my mind =)

Nord LB. North German State Clearing Bank Building

let's get the party started

woah....in a flash my one week holidays in taiwan ended already..and prom nite
something that i was sorta looking forward to..also..
well..perhaps not everything went on the way that i would expect or hope for it to be..but i really enjoyed myself..
cant escape from the basics..
who say meeting up with guys is gay?..
haha
ok i m pretty worn out..slightly distracted by things going around..
but its only a month or so..so gotta treasure it like i never did for any other time before..and just relax....
i've to admit i cant drink for nuts
no no spare me..
jian ting jiayou if ever you read this..we're all praying for u k..
dun touch other patient's equipment!
ok let the pictures do the talking
















nite markets!something that i would definitely miss














random car?!














national palace musuem..history comes alive..














oyster mee sua..

the thing that made me feel what is commiting suicide all about

love river kaoshiung..gosh..romantic..haha

pacific ocean..total sense of freedom!

oh well..i cant stay there

central ximenting

really love this picture

it seem to reflect the vibrancy of nights in taipei

i wanna go back!

well there's far too many pictures..so will just print the rest

ya..and its all taken by my all slow reaction sony ericsson camera phone

haha

alrite prom update some other day

coming to an end woohoo

woohoo...well i m already taking it like its over...but well only left with one paper
looking back cant help but feel so grateful that i survived so long
hahas..i understand now why people said As are the hardest obstacle to cross in life..
on a lighter note..
i need to get a few presents and cards
which means going out
how am i gonna survive till prom?..
guess it will be soon that i will bid bye to normal life and hideaway in bushes on some offshore island...ok just joking..know wont be that terrible..
freedom with challenges?..
that's how i m feeling now..
like seeing people react n change..sometimes make me feel so helpless
perhaps a human's heart will be toughest to comprehend
hmm...but well most important is not to give up on God..
haha..think my blog need massive changes..been looking the same..
hope i'll be able to find howL's album in Taiwan..
hmv only has one shelf of korean music?!?
gotta plan my finances well or i'll be broke before end of the month
going off...enjoy holis people..
haha

random but nice videos

found Howl's song for goong...
woah....he can really sing..
the song is called aeng mu sae..which is parrot!?! in korean
haha
okie.just to take a breather..
back to mugging

an unhealthy encounter

today was really a terrible day...except the dinner and housewarming...which was nice..haha
had hiccups from after lunch all the way till like suppertime
feel like my stomach is totally bloated...can't even eat much.
hai..my childhood sickness is acting up again
please dun even have a relapse in the near future...
oh well..
counting down to like 18 or 19 days more..
yeah
we can all finish this!

Baccalaureate!

well...its official...school has ended..holis has started and examinations are yet to come..
oh..i m getting into the trying to be ignorant bout what's going on again..
time flew by..and wow..i finished two years of JC...
it seem like yesterdae when i first step into that strange looking big blue gate
but all i can say is AC transformed me so totally!..i would never be what i am..without all the ups and DOWNS..
so u guys mug hard too..dun give up..
some recollection and snapshots..
sorrie bout the previous red bold entry..wasnt furious or something
haha


by irwinho



by irwinho


by irwinho


by irwinho


by irwinho

blogger is having some wierd problem.i had to copy the link twice from webshots..
phew..can check the rest from the album link..
yeah..
a touch from God and life will never be the same again..
how true is it when u experience it for yourself..
back to piles of notes n case studys

the haze and all that hazard

well...its time to catch on my poor little blog
school's been pretty usual..the wake up stick your head into endless tasks
that constant need and want to cry for help
your friends around making life seem much more colourful
i'll survive..i mean overcome this
hahas
even when i cant see him, when i cant feel him..i'll trust his heart..
isnt that simple and yet hard at the same time?but believe me u will see your world in a much lighter tone if u just let go and let God =)
perhaps...some people i know are getting cranky..or maybe just enveloped into their own world..
with no else on their minds
they act differently..show their discontent
i m seriously taken aback..
u mean all along u've been feeling this?..but i only know it when my two years are drawing to a close
gosh..well..its never too late i guess
something are just never meant to work out the way i want or the way the other person wants
i m just saddened
found chasing car's vid on youtube..a really catchy n yet slow song..
ignore the mv..it makes no sense..hahas
just finished econs hw...time to sleep =P

new ipod new generation

josong hamnida (pardon me)
but the new ipod really look wow...!!! isnt it?
hahas..i m no really a 'tech gizmos person'
but i m really surprised how fast apple works
presenting ipod nano 2nd generation with double the battery life..=)